GBENGA ADENIJI writes that subdued by the Internet age, letter writing has lost its value as a means of communication among lovers
Like a fairy tale, there was a time when letter writing reigned supreme as an effective communication mode.
Among lovebirds, the exchange of love letters was a constant pastime.
These letters, emotionally-crafted, were often a treasure to the receiver.
Common phrases like-You are the only sugar in my tea; you are the
only cockroach in my cupboard; you are the only flower in my garden; I
drop my pen in the basket of love, among others, were often used to the
delight of the recipients of the letters.
Many people still keep the love letters they received so many years
ago even though they may not be married to the writer. Such was the
power of love letters.
A client service officer with a Lagos-based firm, Bukola Akingbola,
says the allure of love letters in relationships cannot be compared to
any of the newest means of communication.
“I appreciate love letters so much. I remember that I once got one
from an admirer while I was in the secondary school,” she says.
According to her, whenever the going got tough in her relationship
then, she used to take out the letters to remember when the going was
good.
Also, Olumide Olasunkanmi, who works in a hospital, says he was
always joyful when he wrote or received a love letter from an admirer.
He remembers vividly how he was excited 20 years ago, when he got his
first love letter from a girl.
He states that he placed the letter on his chest for minutes and
cuddled it like a baby. Twenty years after, he remembers the exact words
in the letter.
“She wrote: ‘You are such a gentle young guy. A responsible lady like
me must not miss a guy like you. I feel the pleasure whenever you visit
our home with your piano. I will want you to sing me many lovely songs
especially your adaptation of Ebenezer Obey’s
Olomi Jowo Jeka ma Gbadun. I am proud of you for wining our school debate competition,” he says.
But suddenly, like a candle in the wind, love letters are no more.
Akingbola, says the advent of the Short Message Service and the new
technological breakthroughs in communication have taken the shine off
love letters.
Her position was supported by a copywriter, Akeem Akinniyi, who
posits that telephones have discouraged the idea of love letters.
He explains that people find it easy to send a text message or put a
call to their loved ones rather than engage in letter writing.
“The last time I wrote a love letter was in 1996. It is too
old-fashioned in modern times. More so, teenagers have more freedom now
unlike some years ago, when keeping late nights was forbidden. Nowadays,
you see many youths roaming the streets at odd hours. Going by these
realities, you wonder ‘Why play Romeo?’”
Though communication inventions have discouraged letter writing, a
computer engineer, Bolaji Adekunle, says academic laziness on the part
of youths was the straw that broke the camel’s back.
Adekunle, says most of the words contained in text messages are grammatically-flawed.
He says, “Letter writing requires competence. It is unlike SMS, where words can be abbreviated and the reader will not bother.”
A teacher, Samuel Sodeinde, connects the arrival of telephones and
social media to the death of letter writing. He submits that pupils no
longer find it interesting to engage in letter writing when they have
the latest communications gadgets.
Sodeinde says, “I encourage them to write so as to revive the
pitiable state of letter writing in schools. During comprehension
lessons, I often urge them to write and even assure them that if what
they write put them into trouble, I will defend them. It is my view that
the more they write, the more they will see their mistakes and adjust.
“There is no way they can write well if we concentrate on other
communication methods. The coming of mobile telephones and social media
has affected the fortunes of letter writing and any other type of
letters.”
A Professor of Economics, Folayan Ojo, observes that it is not only
letter writing that has been endangered but also the making and buying
of Christmas and birthday cards. He says, rather than purchase any of
these cards for loved ones during celebrations, many now prefer to send
SMS.
Such development, according to the 71-year-old don, has led to the
breakdown in character values, spelling errors and poor performance in
examinations.
“Generally, because of the advent of development in Information
Communication Technology, email, Skype, SMS and all the social
networking sites such as
Facebook, Twitter,
YouTube-where one can upload videos, people no longer write letters.
“This situation has a negative effect on youths who cannot write good
English because of their inability to write either formal or informal
letters.”
The lecturer recalls how he used to communicate via letters with his white girlfriend when he was still studying in Canada.
“I would use a blue writing pad to write to her. It used to be fun in
those days especially during Christmas. That was from 1965 to 1968,
during my undergraduate days. Since there was no mobile phone to
communicate with her, we resorted to exchanging messages through
letters,” he says.
A dealer in second-hand books, Silas Ibinife, who once sold love,
Christmas and birthday cards, states that he abandoned the business when
he noticed that the patronage was drastically dropping.
Ibinife adds that when it dawned on him that people prefer to send
SMS and emails to buying cards, which they would eventually throw away,
he opted for another trade.
A programme officer of a Lagos-based non-governmental organisation,
Francesca Abiola, expresses similar views. According to her, new methods
of communication such as instant messages and SMS have relegated letter
writing to the background. Abiola states that the new methods are
faster and timely compared to letters especially if they have to be
posted.
She says, “There is speed of delivery with these modern means of
communication. You can send an email or SMS and get a reply immediately.
If you have to post a letter, it may take some days before it gets
delivered and you have to wait again for a reply.”
To Oluwakemi Fashoto, a health administrator, people are no longer
interested in putting pen to paper and pouring out their feelings.
Fashoto states that people are now lazy in writing, particularly, for
the youth who she says, find it convenient to delete a SMS after
reading.
She says, “One can also clear chat after a lengthy chat session on
the phone; but “deleting” a love letter on paper is cumbersome. If one
tears and throws it into a dustbin, an inquisitive mother will pick and
read. Set it on fire then a nosy daddy will want to know what’s burning.
“Nowadays, one finds it easier to pour out one’s feelings via phone. I
will feel honoured and valued If I am to receive a love letter in this
age because I know what it takes to write out one’s feelings. Although I
can’t remember the last time I received a love letter.”
A professor of Psychology at the Department of Psychology, Faculty of
Social Sciences, Obafemi Awolowo University, Ile Ife, Oluwatoba
Elegbeleye, says he does not believe that people no longer write love
letters.
The lecturer notes that there are new modern alternatives to writing
love letters which he says are easier, less cumbersome, faster and
convenient.
Elegbeleye adds that technology has taken relationships to a very high level.
“In social sciences where we like to verify facts, we cannot
absolutely conclude on that. I will rather say people no longer use the
missive form because we are operating a ‘noodle’ world where people send
text messages and emails. From another angle, people now read and write
less. But they still communicate love through other modern channels,”
he states.
Perhaps, letter writing did not envisage what lay in stock for its
future when the first mobile telephone call was placed in St. Louis,
Missouri, United States, on June 17, 1946 from a telephone set installed
in an automobile. The feat was the product of over a decade work by
Bell Labs scientists Alton Dickieson, D. Mitchell and H.I. Romnes. Then
in April 3, 1973, a Motorola researcher and executive, Martin Cooper,
made the first mobile telephone call from a handheld subscriber
equipment, calling Dr. Joel S. Engel of Bell Labs.
Interestingly, letter writing may not be the only one facing this
challenge of the ‘once-courted bride.’ The SMS which, despite marking
its two decade in December 2012, after it changed the way people
interact with each other, is believed to be facing threat from
Twitter and other forms of instant messaging.
A typical love letter.