Charlez Blog

Dear readers,
I have an issue that I would like advice from you all.

My boyfriend and I have been dating for some time and we keep having this issue. We are both born again Christians, I'm a youth minister and part of the music team. We love each other very much and are planning on marriage next August. However, he always wants to make love and I always refuse for the reason being, God said we shouldnt fornicate and the fact that I want us to wait till we're married. But he seems to have an issue with this.

Sometimes, I end up giving in and having sex with him. Now when I say no, he asks me " where do I want him to go if he can't have it with me or what do I want him to do with a hard on". I'm beginning to feel frustrated with this whole issue and I'm actually contemplating breaking up. I'm sick and tired of him asking for sex and me saying no. Sometimes when we are making out and things starts getting intense, I stop the kissing and pull myself out of that mood.

Even with that he complains its because I don't find him sexually attractive because if I did I would go all the way and make love. I'm really torn because I love him very much but I just don't want to have sex before marriage. Again he thinks I'm being unfair as in all my previous relationships, I had been sexually active. We are always fighting about this and I'm tired of it. He says I embarrass him and demean him when he has to ask me for sex and I turn him down.

Pleade advice, I don't want to lose him. He's always there for me AMD would do anything to make me happy and demonstrate his love for me but it seems the only thing I can do to demonstrate that o love him, I'm not willing to do. When he initiates sex and I say no, when he gets home, he asks me to send him pictures, not of my face but sexy pictures, boobs etc...I have given in a couple of times and done that, but I personally don't think its right because I know he probably use it to wank.

I know we definitely want to marry but until we do how can I solve this issue? He hates it when I say that i want us to do the right thing and wait. The question I keep asking myself is, when did wanting to do the right thing become wrong. We are really falling apart over this but I don't want to comprise on this.

Thank you for all your advices.